I really do love painting Orks. Not only do they remind me of that time long ago when silly things were truly appreciated in 40k, but they give me the chance to exercise my own silliness too. And boy are they fun to paint. Bright colours, oversized features, bonkers weapons… I love it.
I’ve had the Orruk Megaboss sat on my “to do” list for a while now, and I fancied doing a little creative storytelling in paint and conversion recently, and it got me thinking about using this mini to help tell the awesome story of Rynn’s World. So I got choppin’ and then reached for the yellow – it was time for a new Warboss.
I kept the conversions simple – less is often more, and there were so many parts of the original megaboss model that I wanted to keep that I didn’t want to go too nuts. The one you may notice first is the big choppa (or is it a spinna) that was borrowed from a Deffdred (I doubt he’s getting it back through). It’s incredibly impractical really, but when did that ever stop an ork? I also gave him a top knot and a banner pole, along with a big orky symbol on the shoulder that doesn’t have the giant dragon skull on it. There’s als oa few wires and things here and there to help show off his 40k-ness, and then there’s the robot arm.
This was a fun little bit of storytelling, I thought. On Rynn’s World, during the Waaagh! everyone is fighting (or more likely fleeing from) the orks. So I thought about an Ambot used to hold off this rampaging boss while some folk tried to make it to safety. In the fight, the Ambot cut off the boss’s arm, but the ork was eventually victorious. Game recognising game, the ork ripped off the robot’s arm and instructed a Dok and a Mek to attach it to him. It’s even a crimson colour – a fist, that’s sort of crimson. Nice.
So we can place this guy as a combat monster, and that means he’s bound to have a few scrapes and scuffs and a fair bit of blood (other people’s) on him too, and that meant weathering. Aside from testing things out on the checkered knee, all the weathering happened last and after doing what i thought was a fairly decent job painting the armour, it was off to go in and mess it all up again. To show you what that transformation looked like, I took a before and after shot to show you the transition:
Sorry as always for the slightly out of focus photography, but you can certainly see what changed. And again, storytelling through painting goes into it. I like the scuffs around his jaw armour to represent the shots taken by Space Marines trying to stop him, though no head shot managed to make it through.
I had a little more fun with freehand here, but only in the form of some patterns on the rear armour. Why mainly on the rear? I imagined this ork saying “Don’t put da fancy stuff in front coz it’ll get shot at – put it at da back so da runts behind know wot a rich git I is dat I can have dis fancy arma!” and that convinced me.
The base is simple enough, just a bit of Space Marine leftovers and a couple of other things to bring it into the setting. Poor, poor Crimson Fists.
Anyway, there you have it. I had a whole bunch of fun with this one. In terms of painting progress, I managed to get some really nice blends in the reds and yellows across this mini. Still need to work on my orky flesh but overall I think it all worked out ok. B- maybe for me. Potentially still a C+ but I just had so much fun working on this miniature that I think it maybe gets a little extra.
I hope you’re having just as much fun painting as I am, and I hope you’re enjoying an excellent weekend. Until we speak again; Onwards.
A while back, I finished painting up my first ever Grot Tank, and I loved every second of it. One of the most joyous and characterful miniatures I’ve ever had the pleasure of painting. And while I could take you through all the mechanics of painting it (which could be interesting) I thought I’d do something different here. When you work on something this characterful, your brain starts building a story around it, and boy did my imagination run wild with this one.
So, enjoy some new photos of it, and, if you have the time, enjoy this short story of how, in universe, my grot tank came to be. Onwards.
Grobsnacka was dead. The whispers went round the mekshop like squig-mites through a sack of rusty gubbins. Grot after grot would whisper the words to their fellow workers as they moved guns and gears about the place to the instructions of Mek Zagsnapp. At one point, one slightly new and stupid grot whispered the words to Zagsnapp himself.
“Oo?” replied the Mek as he grabbed the grot who told him in one hand before launching him through the wall “Lissen ya runt, I dun’t giv a zog wot grot gon snuffed it. Get back to werk!”
Eventually, the news reached Ratsnot who was in the process of constructing some new and deadlier dakka spewing weapon that Zagsnapp had come up with. Ratsnot was a young grot, with eyes wider than most of his compatriots and a longer nose too. He had a knack at being cunning, but his dreams of worlds beyond his often lead to him daydreaming and this, in turn, often lead to a clout round the head from his boss.
“Grobsnacka snuffed it”
The words fell into his notched and slightly singed ears like clattering mallets. Not Grobsnacka, he thought. It’s impossible. The fiercest, most cunning grot he’d ever met? Dead? As he continued to hammer away his eyes glazed. Grobsnacka was a legend.
“Wot ‘bout da treasure?” he mumbled to the noisy shop around him.
He peered over in the direction of Zagsnapp who was now arguing with a Nob. The giant brute was gesticulating, though somewhat more slowly than he would have liked as the arms of his mega armour had malfunctioned. He’d normally be able to smash the feckless mek through the ceiling but Zagsnapp had been able to dodge several blows already due to the fact that each took at least 45 seconds to come anywhere near him.
Ratsnot tip-toed behind the Mek as he promised a brand new planet killing weapon to the somewhat animated monster in front of him. Ratsnot knew he had to get to Grobsnacka but leaving the shop before the boss said so was an offence punishable by being told to stand next to the malfunctioning (and suspiciously sentient) Shokk Attack Gun that hung on the wall at the back of the shop. The blasted thing had dined on several of his colleagues over the years. But Ratsnot was good at sneaking, and moved almost soundlessly from work bench to work bench, sometimes nonchalantly picking up a hammer and inspecting it thoughtfully. Unfortunately, he put so much into the craft of looking like he was working, he actually started to do some work on several occasions before remembering that he was trying to get to the squig-flap at the back of the shop.
By sheer luck, and after fixing two big shootas and painting a boss pole, he was within striking distance of the exit when a rather large hand grabbed him by the shoulders. The giant figure of Zagsnapp glared down at him, his gnarled face twisting around his cybernetic eyes that glowed a terrifying shade of bruied scarlet.
“An’ wot is uze doin, runt?”
“Errr… fetch gubbinz, boss?” he pointed to the big pile of said gubbinz not too far from him and grinned the grin of innocence that only the guilty can master.
The hand tightened around his shoulders and he was lifted up to eye-level with the monstrous Mek.
“If I wantz uze to get more gubbinz, I’ll tellz uze to get more gubbinz. I fink uze was bein’ a sneaky git. An’ we don’t like sneaky gitz ‘round ‘ere.”
All the gretchin in the workshop had stopped and were looking in terror as Ratsnot squirmed in Zagsnapp’s vice like grip, his eyes wide with panic.
“Err… boss?” he offered meekly
“Behind you, boss”
“You fink I’m fick, runt? I ain’t fallin’ for dat ol’ lugnut.” he snarled, as a thick, foamy spittle dribbled out from between his enormous fangs. “You fink I woz born tomorrow? I fink it’s da shokk attack gun for-“
Zagsnapp was now aware that he was in the very slow moving vice-like grip of the Nob who was still not particularly happy about his glacially moving mega armour. Slow as it was though, the giant claws it was fitted with still seemed to work well enough. The Mek had just enough time to turn and face his unhappy customer before the claws became a vice.
“Ere!” shouted Zagsnapp as he was lifted off his feet “I’ll build ya a big wagon! Or a stompa or summin’!”
“Maybe” offered the enraged (yet now quite entertained) Nob “You wanna fix dis soot, first, yeah”
“Yea! Of corze! Easy! But it’ll take a bit. Lots to do!”
“I dun’t wanna ‘ear ya excuses ya git!”
“Dey’s not excuses! Mega gubbinz is tricky! Like cunnin’ tricky an’ I gotta-“
It was at this point that both the Nob and the Mek turned to face the tiny grot that was still being held up by Zagsnapp. Ratsnot gulped as their menacing gazes bore into him. He had never been so far out of his depth and all three of them knew it. Then the two enormous orks glared at his finger that was pointing at a small red button on the side of the Nob’s neck plate.
What happened next could only have happened in an ork’s mekshop because only in said mekshop could the laws of physics be bent around the greenskins’ latent psychic ability with that much exposed wiring, weaponry and ammunition. It’s almost impossible to describe in full detail without having to lie down and assess one’s understanding of the universe. However there are some highlights that can be easily relayed, such as Ratsnot pushing the button on the Mega Armour. Then there’s the look of sheer panic on the face of the Mek who probably had more of an inkling than most about what was about to happen and why he was in the worst place possible in the history of anything ever. Shortly after this, there was a rush of steam and a very strange whirling crackling noise. Then the mega armoured Nob did a a leaping summersault against his will. The claw also closed before springing open at such a rate that the individual digits shot off the fist and lodged themselves in various things the shouldn’t ever have been ruptured in such a way. One activated the shokk attack gun which swallowed and then ejected two grots, a missile, several cases of ammo and some fuel. Another cliipped the wing of a bomma that hung from the ceiling and was shortly afterwards swinging around like a pendulum, crashing into anything and everything that went bang in the shop. Four squigs exploded. A bucket of highly prized purple paint fell onto three grots who were never seen again. A strange device the orks had nicked from another world opened and loads of little fiery daemons fell out of it before running amok. Half the roof fell in, and small fissure opened up in the floor that swallowed a deff dred.
Crucially though, as all of this mayhem began, Ratsnot was thrown through the wall and out into the street beyond. He picked himself up and watched in awe as the chaos began to ensue and while other orks ran toward the exploding shop, either looking for a fight or something to steal, Ratsnot ran off into the dusk.
Grot-town was a hovel in the least desirable part of the city. Tiny dwellings that were often sat on by orks who had nothing better to do were crumbling and cracked even before the brutes of the clan placed their backsides on them. Trash everywhere, which wasn’t even good enough to be useful or edible flew around on the winds, and smog from the mek shops choked the air. As Ratsnot scampered and scrambled through the quiet gutters, he could still hear the shop behind him exploding and falling over.
Eventually he reached the centre of the collective hovel and found the tiny hut he was looking for. He ran in under the scrap of fabric that served as a door and saw for himself. Laying on an old tire, lay the body of Grobsnacka. It was a shock to the young grot’s system. Gretchin didn’t die of old age. They got squished, eaten, smashed, exploded and dropped from large heights, but they didn’t die old, and by their standards, Grobsnacka was ancient. No-one knew exactly how old, by virtue of the fact that they didn’t really count much or have a way of measuring time, but everyone knew he was proper old.
Stood next to the old tire was Zitslapp, who had been Grobsnacka’s oldest friend (though still greatly his junior). He looked sadly over at Ratsnot who quietly shuffled into the dimly lit room.
“Snuffed it quiet. Never seen dat. Never wanna see dat again. Not rite. Just sorta snuffin’ it quiet an’ wivowt a scrap” offered Zitslapp
Ratsnot’s ears flattened and seldom has a grot ever looked so sad. His friend, and mentor, was indeed gone.
“Poor git” he offered. They both nodded. “Did he eva tell uze ‘bout da tre-“
Zitslapp’s hand covered Ratsnot’s mouth.
“Shut ya gob.” He looked around shiftily before adding “come wiv me”
They both took one last look at the grimly peaceful old grot before stepping out into the darkening streets.
Ten minutes later, after trying to look nonchalant again, they arrived at the back of a different Mek’s workshop. This one was thankfully not in-mid explosion and the sound of industry spilled out into the streets. Zitslapp went up to a piece of corrugated metal and began to undo one of the bolts that held it in place with a tiny, worn spanner. Ratsnot recognised the implement – it had belonged to Grobsnacka and the old ork had once told him that it only opened one sort of bolt in town, and that only one such bolt and spanner combo existed. As security went, this was almost worthy of legend in the ork community.
Eventually the nut fell to the floor and Zitslapp slid the panel aside smoothly, revealing a tiny space to squeeze into. The two grots only just fit themselves through but eventually they were inside the wall. And it was only seconds later they were falling, though not for very long. They landed in a dark basement beneath the shop above where they could hear the hammerings, shoutings and scurryings they were all too familiar with.
“Zog it’s dark.” muttered Ratsnot as he picked himself up off the floor.
“Dere’s a switch on da wall” came the voice of Zitslapp from the gloom. Both gretchin moved around the dark walls a minute or so before Ratsnot’s hand found a switch. He threw it and light burst into the basement. He turned around and when he realised what he was looking at, his fang filled jaw almost hit the floor.
“I fort it… wasn’t it… teef?” splutted the young grot. Zitslapp grinned.
“It was wunce. Den he spent da teef of gubbins and dakka and now…”
“‘As it got a name?”
“Yep. Grob’s Freedum”
The tank was beautiful. A riot in shades of golden yellow, a massive big shoota sticking out of its turret, and actual exhausts coming out of the back. There wasn’t even too much rust on the tracks. Ratsnot had never seen something so beautiful. This, this was freedom. This was respect. Even the Orks would have to stand aside for this thing. Life in the workshops was done, and now, they could finally join Da Waaaggh!
“We made it tugeva,” said Zitslapp, wiping a tear from his beady red eye “doin’ it for all my life pretty much. It woz ‘is idea. But it took so long. Da scrap just wernt dere for ages. Den wen we finished it, he sed ‘e woz too old. Wanted uze ta be part of da croo insted a him.”
“Croo?” said Ratsnot, still in a daze.
“Yep. I do da drivin’, an uze do da dakka and da pointin’. Wot yu finkin’? Up for it?”
Boss Mek Slugsmash was only vaguely aware of the rumble beneath his feet but this was his mekshop and if something was rumbling it was obviously because he’d told the runts to make something rumble, even if he didn’t remember doing so. It was only when the shooting started and all the grots legged it that he became more interested. He stood up upon his creaking bionic legs and stomped towards the noise, picking up his big choppa from a work bench as he went. Then the back wall of his workshop fell over. When the rubble and dust cleared, he looked over and saw, driving away from his shop, a grot tank rumbling away in the distance. He could make out, through the smoking trail it was leaving behind it, a small grot, wearing a hat, waving and pointing at the throng of grots who were cheering them on.
I figured, as I’ve been banging on about the Desk Project that I’m doing at the moment rather a lot recently, I’d do something fun and silly for this Friday. So, to give you a couple of minutes of hopefully Orkish giggles at the end of a long week, I give you the Ork name generator. Now, long ago, I did the Ork clan name generator and it was a lot of fun. But I wanted to test myself (and particularly my Orkish vocabulary) by making a generator that can help you come up with the name of an Ork character, boss or boy. So here you go:
As you can probably tell, it works pretty simply. Your first initial and second initial make up your Ork’s forename, and the first letter of your street name and mother’s maiden name will give you the Ork’s surname. Well, I don’t think it’s really a surname – more of an dis-honorific. A nickname… whatever it is, this is how it works. So my name would be Jabarm Squigtroopa. If your name was Rob Stevens and you lived on Jones St, and your mother’s maiden name was Howard, your Ork name would be Redshag Jawhacka. Get it?
Well, you know the drill. Have a go, leave a comment below and tell me what you think of it. Did you like what you got, can you think of improvements, or do you now wish you were called something else? Either way, I hope it gives you a brief moment of Orky goodness after a hard week – you’ve earned your teef, and a good weekend to be sure.
And one final word about the desks project; I’ve started to build the page! It’s coming along great and we’ve had more submissions than I was expecting. Provided I can get everything organised by next week, it should be going up then, so keep an eye on the blog for that update. Onwards!
I want to talk about Grots. These diminutive greenskins don’t get a vast amount of attention or column inches, but I’ve always been of the mind that they are key to making the Orks what they are – loads of fun. So let’s take a look at the life and times of these little beggers.
A Bit Of History
Of all the alien races to appear in Warhammer 40,000 the first were the Space Orks (Ok, so the Eldar can claim that too, but give them this). These were the Space Marines’ greatest enemies. Well, they were the first of many great enemies but at the time, these guys were the greatest threat to the galaxy. And scurrying between the legs of the lumbering Orks, were the Gretchin and slowly they began to make their mark on the history of 40k.
When Rogue Trader came out, as discussed in previous articles, there was a lot of borrowing from Fantasy. When the Orcs were ported over, the Goblins were too and in the 1st edition of Warhammer 40,000, these were the Gretchin. Back then, these small pointy-nosed space goblins weren’t entirely the subservient grots that we know today. Indeed, these guys could outsmart the larger Orks and even had their own empires and fleets separate to the larger clans. And in 1991, they got their first batch of models with some 20+ lead Gretchin appearing that still bare a great resemblance to those available today.
Arguably their greatest moment was the inclusion of 40 plastic Gretchin in the 2nd Edition Starter Box, though they suffered from all sharing the same pose and they didn’t have any of the humour of their metal counterparts. But since this point, they have been a real ever present part of the Ork Army. In 1996 the metal range was bolstered further with another 20+ models either carrying autopistols and swords or autoguns, and these restored some of the comic-relief which the original models had offered, while staying more in line with the grimdark. But by this point they had become the lackies of their muscle-bound cousins, and their cunning was no longer enough.
Grots as we know them today probably first cropped up in Gorkamorka. 1997’s release saw them become more rebellious and cheeky (especially when led by the infamous Red Gobbo) as they formed rebel gangs on the scorched planet and this takes us to today.
After a finecast release with a Runtherd just a few years ago, they now crop up in Ork kits in the same way that Nurglings crop up in Nurgle kits. Often hefting spanners, bizarre little knives and shootas, or doing something comical that is bound to get them stepped on by a Mek, they provide a softer edge that the Orks need. Without them the greenskins would just be scary and stupid. The grots provide a giggle here and there, often being the diminutive fall guy, almost a Mutley-like character, whether they’re hanging off the back of a dakka jet or getting sucked into Shokk Attack Gun.
Let’s Get Fluffy
All Ork clans produce grots. In fact, there are more grots than Orks. They are small, weak and cunning to a degree but their greatest strength is numbers. There are lots of them and together, when under the orders of a runtherd or mekboy, they can accomplish some great things (though they rarely get the credit).
As mentioned above, they used to have their own empires but this idea has been, for the most part, squashed (though there’s nothing to say you can’t have a bizarre ork society that doesn’t have a gene for creating bigger Orks). Forgeworld have given them a couple of nice bonuses though and you can now field grot tanks, forged from the scrap that the meks deem surplus to requirements. There isn’t a great deal more to their fluff anymore. The only named grot I can think of, Makari, has long since dropped Ghazghkull Thraka’s battle standard, so that’s about it for fluff. Oh, and there’s the Red Gobbo but he’s still stuck on Gorkamorka.
Time To Talk Tactics
What tactics? They’re Gretchin! 😉 You get a great big mob of them (at least 10), hide them until they can claim an objective and then that’s it. They die pretty fast so keep them in cover and only use them to score when it’s safe. The good thing is though is that they’re so cheap (even by Ork standards) and that means you can have a bucket load of them, though if you don’t want them to run away (seriously, if you don’t know what their leadership is, you’ll laugh when you see it) as soon as another unit looks at them, a runtherd is a good idea. And that is seriously about it. Oh, and make sure they go to ground every turn – they’ll need to in order to survive.
The only other things you can try is using them as a tar pit (but you have to make sure your enemy can’t scare them away or dish out too many attacks) or as a human shield (even though almost everything can see over them). Really, the best thing to do is get them to an objective and keep them hidden.
If Looks Could Kill…
I think the GW designers did a great job moving away from the ‘Goblins with Guns’ look that would have been so easy to plump for with grots. Even in the Rogue Trader era, they had more to them than that. They have the look of the trampled upon masses, which is fitting because that is literally what they are. Scraps of clothing, pieced together weapons and tools and rags denoting that they do the jobs that Orks won’t do (probably because they’re too busy smashin’ stuff).
I don’t know if you could ever go so far as to say that grots are cute, but for something with squinty eyes, a big pointy nose, green skin and fangs, they do have a certain charm. Their comedic nature is part of this and some of the facial expressions that GW’s designers have given them are priceless. Ranging from ‘nonplussed’ to ‘worst attempt at scary ever’, they have some great looks.
Ah, The Memories…
You know, I think it was Gretchin that gave me my hatred of painting large squads of models. When I first got the 2nd Edition box all those years ago, I used to love painting the Orks and Space Marines. Alright, there wasn’t a lot of variation in those guys but at least you could change a few arm positions and you’d get a different type of gun every now and again. But those grots, all 40 of them, put me off for life. So many autoguns…
That being said, I probably didn’t paint them all anyway. I was a kid who got very easily distracted and I think I remember actually smashing one of those Gretchin up in anger. That was a shameful moment, so it’s only right to pay homage to the long-suffering Gretchin here.
Do not pity the grot, but show it respect, for though it is small, and weak, and a bit of a pussy when it comes to actual fighting, it has a quiet, ugly nobility to it. It has been with us from the beginning and has made us laugh more often than cry. For those reasons, it deserves a little respect.
Are you a big fan of grots? Or do you plain hate them? What did you think of the post? Stick your comments below!
As promised, here are some slightly nicer shots of these monstrosities. They’ve been handed back to their owner after their makeover and I’m happy to say that he was delighted. I managed to get a handful of slightly nicer looking shots before I packaged them up and sent them on their merry way, and so I’m sharing them with you now.
The things I’ve really enjoyed about this mini project include learning how to paint Ork skin again, the sheer amount of rust I’ve been able to add and the checks. Those checkered patterns were loads of fun to do and I’m happy with the results – especially the black/red check.
A successful project and I’m very proud of my first commission. I shall miss seeing these chaps on my painting table as I have done for the last couple of weeks. I’ll get back to Orks soon enough though, as I’ve got to Boss-up a couple of them too. Keep your eyes very much on this blog for a couple of future Orky Updates.
All painted using Citadel Paints, undercoated Grey (White from top/Black from below) and painted with a variety of brushes including Citadel and W&N. On to the next project. WAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!
The third Ork Meganob of this commission is done, and he was a barrel of fun to work on too, though it had a few frustrating moments, and I did the best rescue job I could with that crashed rokkit…
Let this serve as a warning to anyone buying models second hand, or just as a general modelling lesson really. Some people have great ideas, but no skill in executing them. I include myself in that, but when I’m trying to learn any painting or modelling tricks, I don’t start out on the showcase miniature. Begin with a grunt if you have to use a miniature at all – something from the bits box means you can get it wrong and it doesn’t matter. This would have been sage advice to give to the guy that my buddy (for whom these orks are for) bought these from, but alas apparently no sages were there to give it. The rokkit in the base is a nice idea, but it not only cost a combi launcha on another ork but it was literally just stuck in there. I’ve done what I can for it by adding a small plume of smoke, building up a slight crater around it (hard to see in these images) and making it look like it had at least the hint of an exhaust but it’s the sort of thing that has the potential to ruin an entire model. I like to think I’ve rescued it though so we’ll leave that mini rant/advice snippet for now and look at some more shiny pictures.
I flipped the colours around on this guy – no two orks should ever have armour that looks the same – and it was interesting seeing a black shoota and a red klaw as opposed to visa versa. This Goff-ish colour-scheme is really fun to play around with and mix up across the models what with all the chequered patterns and the like, and I’m glad I tried this switch around.
Other than all of that, it’s as you were really. A rusty klaw that I’m very happy with, a couple of nice glyphs and a lighter skin shade for this ork too. Actually, I’ve been ecstatic with the skins I’ve managed to do and it’s so fun to paint that there have actually been a couple of times when I’ve almost thought ‘yeah, I could do an Ork army…’ and then the Emperor’s ghost bitchslaps me and I remember that not every boy is as fun to paint as these guys. Still, there’s a relatively simple formula that I could share on here at some point – it’s pretty fun and I at least like the results.
So, I’m going to call this squad done. I’m still going to be doing a couple more of these but they will take a bit more time and this is sort of the official ‘squad’ of three. That means there’ll be some glamour shots of the whole squad going up over the next couple of days, so keep an eye out. I’ve really been enjoying these orks and I’m really happy that I’ve taken to them so quickly. Not perfect by any stretch, but for someone who hasn’t painted one in 20 years, they ain’t half bad. And now, the obligatory “WAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!!!!”
Ork Meganob with Twin Linked Shoota and Power Klaw
Waaaaagggghhhhh!!! Another ork Meganob (still giggling at that) is done. Stomping into battle across the urban wasteland looking to smash all in its path, it also appears to have turned up with Night Fighting in force judging by the photos. Apologies about that – it was a late night shoot. Sexy shots will come when the whole squad is finished but really wanted to show him off today too.
I inverted the colour-scheme for this one a bit. Whereas the last one had a lot of red and a little black, this one has his armour the other way round. You can’t really tell from these pictures, but the skin is a bit lighter too. I want each ork in this squad of five to have a completely different skin tone, and this one started with a base of Warboss Green rather than Waaaagh Flesh and I’m happy with the look. I’m also a big fan of the black and red check look which I think I nailed (even if I say so myself) on the shoulder pad.
I won’t wax too lyrical on this. I’m really happy with how he came out and just wanted to share a few pics with you. Any constructive criticism is always welcome and if you’ve got anything you think I could be doing better, let me know why and how in the comments section. This model was undercoated in a mix of white from above and black from below, Citadel paints were used throughout and a mix of W&N (Series 7 finest Sable 000) and Citadel (Fine Detail) brushes were used throughout. Here are a couple more images for you. On to the next one!
Games Workshop has, as its current logo dictates, become Games wORKshop this month with the impending release of Codex Orks. We’ve had the Gorkanaut and Morkanaut, the Flash Gitz and more are on the way each week. Having painted my first Ork in a long time just last week, I thought I’d take this opportunity to share the 10 reasons why I have a soft spot for these ugly, green lugs. This is why I like the Orks…
1. Da Way Dey Tawk
Da fing is, wivout der unike way of speakin, Orks wud jus be scary. Dis makes em almost luvabol in a big teefed, shooty, stompy, scary sort of way. Wen yu see dem, it is almost impossible not to speak like dis. WAAAAAAGGGGHHHHHH!!! …right, that’s enough of that.
2. Their Punk Heritage
When GW started out in Hammersmith way back when, they were in a hub of punky activity. With the legendary Odeon (now Apollo) just down the road, and with early 80s London dominated by Punk and the NWOBHM (New Wave of British Heavy Metal – think Maiden and Priest, etc), it isn’t surprising that this ended up in GW’s products. It actually gave them a great opportunity to bring a Tolkien-based fantasy species into the future. The colourful, ‘homemade’ look of Orks really plays up to that punky thing, and the Goff Rockers are still available to this day. I’m genuinely surprised there aren’t Ork characters called Jonny Rotter and Jozz Trummer.
3. The Comedy Value
Both of the above facts lend themselves to the Space Orks’ status as 40k’s Funniest Faction. Nurgle may be charming and funny to an extent, but Orks can be downright hilarious. From Grots to Bommers, from Squigs to Weirdboyz, they know how to have a laugh and still be ferocious at the same time.
Well, if you’re going to bring Orcs over from Fantasy, you couldn’t very well leave out Goblins could you? They made the jump in the days of Space Elves, Space Dwarves and Space Rats (the latter two long since devoured by Hive Fleets), and I’m really glad the Space Goblins hung around. They are the top of the bill when it comes to entertainment value and whether you call them Grots, Gretchin or Space Goblins, it’s almost impossible not to love them.
5. The Yarrick / Ghazghkull Grudge / Love Story
Big Mag Uruk and Sebby Y are in possession of one of the greatest beefs in all of 40k law. An Orkish-talking Commissar and the most brutally cunning (and cunningly brutal) of all Ork Warbosses have been doing a deadly dance since the 2nd War for Armageddon. From Hades Hive to Golgotha and back again, these two have been trading blows for a long time. There was even a brief spell where Yarrick was Ghazgkull’s prisoner, though was released out of the great Greenskin’s respect for his abilities. Their fight continues…
6. The Shokk Attack Gun
This weapon has been around for decades now and instills as much fear in the user as it often does in the target (not to mention the grots that end up being swallowed up to thing to give it its ‘juice’). It always makes for an ‘exciting’ game when you see one of these facing you.
I suppose it’s derived from ‘Nobles’ but never the less, the monicker assigned to the biggest, toughest orks still makes me giggle as if I were waiting for an Eastbound Piccadilly Line train (Londoners will know what I mean). And of course, Meganobz are even funnier.
8. The Octarius War
On a distant world, a war rages that may go some way to deciding the fate of the galaxy in the 41st Millennium. Thanks to an Inquisitorial plot, an enormous war rages between Orks and Tyranids with no clear victor in sight. The Eldar and Imperium try to get involved every now and again, but this is an Ork vs Bug fight and whoever wins that will be a real force to be reckoned with.
9. Dakka and Dice
Every box of orks should come with a dice cube because if you’re going to war with Greenskins, you always need more dice. Lootas are best for this, and it’s always funny to watch them try to hit anything (until they have an unnaturally good roll and suddenly half your army is dead).
10. All of the Above
They’re fun. Whether they’re blowing themselves up or ripping the arms off they’re enemies, they’re a laugh. I always notice that, as a rule, Ork players tend to take the dice rolls with a better spirit than many others. If you’re hitting on sixes all the time, you don’t expect much, and yet you can often still come out on top. Orks remind us that this hobby is about a game more than anything else, and that’s why I love ‘em. I may never build an army myself, but it’s always a laugh to play against them, even when you get dakka-ed to pieces. let’s hope the comedy value (and a couple of nice buffs) are included in the new Codex.
It’s friday today and I reckon that that’s as good an excuse as any for a bit of fun. How about trying to work out your Ork Clan’s name?
I’ve been playing around with these naming Matrixes for a while now. There’s loads of them around the net (including the one that produced the wonderful ‘Moon Moon‘ meme) and so I thought I’d have a go and I filled it with the Orkiest words werdz I could find. After all, they are the most fun army out there – who else could have a Go Fasta paint job? And all that silly dakka? It’s the sense of humour that makes orks so enjoyable to play with or against. In fact, in a Grimdark galaxy, they’re a rare point of amusement and enjoyment.
So, what’s your Ork krew called, then?
So dat wud make me ‘Ead of da Jaggid Axes. Nice. Wot’z your krew, den?